Jed's First Day at the Beach

Jed had to spend a bit of time at Children's hospital working on his jaundice. He was such a trooper... his mommy on the other hand, not so much! It was really hard to see my sweet little boy hooked up to everything. It's just another step in our journey of Jed.

Thanksgiving with the Penners

This year we spent Friday night with the Penner extended family. It was (and always is) such a blast to see everyone, talk about life and watch our family grow and grow!!! Last year we had 3 baby "cousins" and 1 on the way. This year we have 5 baby cousins and 2 on the way!!! Each year, it will get progressively more wild and loud as we have little kids running around everywhere.

Our new family!

Jesse, Jon and Andrea

Aaron and Christy

Jeremy, Justin, Chelsea and Brandon

Mac, Janice, Luke, Becca, Allie, Arris and HP

Jaden and Christopher... having so much fun!

Baby Jedidiah

What a crazy couple of weeks... On November 16th at 4:00am I was taken off of my magnesium drip to stop pre-term labor. I was still feeling about 4 contractions an hour, they were not very painful at all. Over night from the 16th to the 17th the baby had a few decels or a decrease in the heart rate that was concerning to the doctors. They decided at 7:00 on November 17th to induce labor. After all of that waiting, our day had finally come. I was so ready to meet our child.

Dr Mason came in at 7:30 to break my water. When he broke my water, I was already dilated to a 6, 100% effaced. They immediately hung the pitocin drip which would help labor progress. Within minutes, I began feeling the contractions more severely. One of my anesthesia friends was in a c-section and would be a full hour and a half before I would get the epidural. Thank goodness for epidurals! My nurse checked me after the epidural and I was already a 9 1/2 and 100%!!! My body was ready to have this baby! I "labored down" for another hour or more and started pushing at 11:30. Jesse was rooting for me to have the baby at 12:00pm, but I ended up pushing for 45 minutes and at 12:16 our sweet little boy was born. He was healthy, screamed right away and required no assistance despite being only 36 weeks along.

Jesse and I looked at him and pondered what we would call this precious gift of ours. It took about 15 minutes before we figured it out... and finally we arrived on Jedidiah Jesse Penner. Jedidiah means "Beloved of the Lord" which is a huge part of why we chose it. We felt like throughout our entire situation, Jed was always covered by God's love and provision.

We took Jed home with us less then 24 hours later... I was SOOOO ready to be out of the hospital. The following day we took him to the pediatrician to have his first check up and bilirubin test (which measures for Jaundice). His bilirubin level came back a bit high, but she was not concerned yet. We came back on Monday, where the level was higher and again on Tuesday. He had lost 12 ounces since birth and had a bilirubin level of 20.9, which required him to go to Children's Hospital.

I was truly devastated. I knew in my heart that our son would be fine, however, I did not want to go back to the hospital, especially over Thanksgiving. It was so hard to look at Jed in his isolette when they covered his precious and beautiful eyes. I couldn't see his facial expressions... the ones that I had fallen so deeply in love with. I spent the first couple of hours crying over his isoleete. More then anything, I felt like I couldn't provide for Jed, I had to do everything through holes... feed him, change him... it was so hard.

We were told that we would not go home until Thursday morning. I was so disappointed because we heard a few different stories as to when we would be able to go home. At 9:30 a different doctor came in to visit us. She said everything looked great and that we could go home!!! God is so faithful. It seems like something so small, however, it was such a huge victory for our family. We were home by 1130 and we all slept well in our own beds.

This Thanksgiving brings such a different meaning of thanks. We have so much to be thankful for including great friends and family who have been our prayer warriors for the last month and a half while I have been in the hospital. We have had countless visitors, meals, gifts, text messages, and prayers come our way. This situation would have been so much more difficult without everyone. For that, thankyou!

Epidural in... yeah!

My first moments with baby Jed.

Our little thug loving life in the beanie!

Proud daddy!

The grandmas getting a first peek at their new grandson!

Baby's first bath without his cord on Thanksgiving day!!!

After singing Great Grandpa happy birthday!

Our new family!!!

Great Grandma is wearing an apron with all her grandbabies and now great grandbabies on it! She brought it especially to add Jedidiah's name on it! How sweet!

And these are the two people I am the most thankful for. This is what I woke up to on Thanksgiving day. Jed was sleeping on his daddy's chest... and daddy was sleeping also. Doesn't get much sweeter than that!

Baby Shower Fun!!!

While I was in the hospital, on November 7th my sweet friends and family threw me a baby shower. It was so hard to decide whether to postpone it, change it... or who knew what. My amazing husband, yes, amazing, was such a trooper and volunteered (mind you while I was really really sick because he later tried to get out of it) to participate and go on behalf of the baby and me. It was so hard to miss being a part of all of the work that went in to the spectacular event, but thank goodness for technology! I was able to skype into the event and enjoy it from the hospital room!

Some of the beautiful decorations... soooo creative!

Everyone had a lunch box with 2 sandwiches, a few peach jewels, a red velvet cupcake and a peach cup! Yummmm. I even got a special delivery up in the hospital room with my very own to enjoy with everyone!

The gals who threw me the amazing shower...Cherie, Christy, Jen, Becca and Margie... my mom was missing from this one because she was visiting me!

A nice family picture... me included!

Grandma Hanson, my mom Darlene, my aunt Gloria and cousin Chelsey

Jesse trying on the hand made feeding cover (from my Aunt Gloria)... impressive!

In prepping Jesse I told him that he needed to lay clothes on his stomach because that's what we pregnant people do. He was spot on!

This was the set up... when people came in, I was able to see them. I got to see most of the gifts and program as well!

Lacey, Breann and Katrina

Katrina, Michele and Jen

Space Mountain

Today, marks 19 days that I have been at Saint Agnes "cooking" my little one a bit longer. Some days are long, some shorter. I have emotionally good days full of optimism and strength and days where my eyes burn from being tearful. The Lord has taken me on a ride for sure. I liken it to a Disneyland ride because yes, I signed up for this and love the idea of it (just like space mountain). It's a thrill every time I feel the baby kick, see his or her heart beat and is totally worth every hard moment in the end. However, sometimes the ride can be nauseating and gives me whip lash. I have learned of God's plan and provision.

When I was in college, Jen Bell was my mentor. We embarked on a journey to study and memorize scripture. James was one of our main targets. In James 1:2-3ish it says, "Consider it pure joy my brothers, WHEN you face trials of many kinds knowing that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may become mature and complete not lacking anything." There are two reasons why I share this. First the discipline of memorizing scripture was amazing. For the first week I was not able to read anything or focus well. I was trapped inside my body in a sense. If it were not for the Lord's Word floating around in my head, I may have gone crazy. His constant reminder of promise and provision was reassuring and calming. The second reason is that we are promised trials. Because of this promise, I wasn't spending my time angry at God. He is in control, He knows our hearts and He has planned everything ahead of time.

God is good. His word is sweet. His love is deep and comforting.

Tomorrow marks a big day for me. At 4am we turn off this wonderful drug slowing my contractions. We really don't know what will happen. I may start contracting again and have a baby tomorrow. There is a just as likely chance that I will not show signs of labor and go home for a few more weeks of rest and sanity before our lives change forever. I feel like I have driven across the entire country just to knock on a precious friends door and see if they are home. (I wish they had a cell phone to call ahead!)

The Lord had calmed my heart. At first I was so anxious to get this baby out and get home. Now, I realize that the best thing for this baby may for me to be agonizingly board for another few weeks and let him or her grow some more. So, I am in a place where either way, I will not be too upset.

Thank you so much to everyone who has surrounded us. Friends and family have spent so much time preparing meals, bringing flowers and snacks and praying for us. This is one of those times where you feel like words aren't enough.